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28 September 2005

J-Files Case# 802.11a - Operation Burgundy Buffalo (Supplement 1)

Secret Location: WJX, 26 Sep 2006 1245 ZULU

We broke for lunch and my two local agents brought me to a nearby restaurant. I went "Uh-oh..." as I stepped out the car when I see a pictures of donkeys pasted all over the windows.

Yes, that's right, I am about to go eat a donkey. Supposedly a local delicacy here but I can't help but think if there was silent dissent below the ranks.

First, we were presented with the steamboat with the broth generously ladled with spices. The first plate was donkey meat, the normal parts (Picture left), and I took the first piece after letting it cook in the steamboat for a few minutes. It tasted quite good and chewy but I couldn't help noticed the silent snickering of the 2 agents seated opposite me. They must be thinking (silently, of course)...

Kiss My Ass.

Lick My Ass.

You Suck Ass.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, the next plate was, horrors of all horrors, Donkey Dong! Luckily they sliced it up before bringing to the table (Picture right) or I really won't know how to go about eating it, if it were one SINGLE piece. I'd probably grab it and slap the two agents with it.

I was silently cursing: Nin Nah Beh... kio lim peh Kum Bey Lan.....

Not wanting to lose face, I bravely took a piece from the steamboat and ate it. Sigh... Literally chwee tat lan.

As I was chewing it, I was like "Eh? Buay pai leh... quite nice to eat leh...." and then I did the unthinkable after stuffing my mouth with a donkey's dick.

I swallowed.

Siao liao... I think I going gay liao....

All these while, these 2 si nong kiahs sitting opposite me were grinning like 2 silly monkeys all throughout the lunch.

"Nairmind..." I thought to myself. "I am sooooo going to send the two of you to Tikrit."

- Voxeros


1. Jaslyn left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 1:33 am :: http://precious-jas.blogspot.com
Very nb de brave sia Papa J!!!!


2. Meepok left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 8:18 am
When in China, I typically don't want to ask what I'm eating. If it's in the plate and the locals eat it, I assume it's edible. With this philosophy, I probably would have eaten half the animal species in Singapore zoo. No wonder my IQ keeps dropping.


3. nadnut left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 8:54 am :: http://nadnut.blogspot.com
wahhahaa. so i guess ull definitely swallow and not spit. heh.
anyway, wats sio hoon kee ?


4. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 9:04 am :: 
Jaslyn: *sniff* Mouth no more virgin liao. *sniff*

Meepok: The old cantonese saying goes "If it's back faces the sun, it is edible."
Joke all we want but we also need to think how this came about. Perhaps it was sheer hunger and poverty that they were driven to eating anything and everything for the sake of survival?

Take this other story for example.

I have heard of this Cambodian business man who has a farm breeding tarantula spiders for his restaurant.

He was a prisoner during the Khmer Rouge regime back then when he was spared his life.

The condition however, was that he was to be abandoned in the middle of the jungle and it is up to him to decide if he is going to survive.

He resorted to eating the tarantulas.

When the Khmer Rouge were gone and he returned to civilisation, he kept reminiscing about how yummy the spiders were and hence decided to start a business selling them as food.


5. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 9:17 am :: 
Nadnut: Yeah... I think everybody should swallow and not spit...
.... donkey meat lah.... what were you thinking? :P
btw, sio = burn = smoke; hoon kee = cigarette.


6. akk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 9:24 am
swallow and not spit!!! muahahaha....Jay! U and nad both made my day siah! fantastic start to Drudgery Wednesday, must stifle the sniggering in the office...wah lau...


7. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 10:20 am ::
Akk: I think I got the "longer" end of the straw. I kena the donkey. Oh the trauma!


8. milktea left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 12:31 pm
I once ate snake meat and it was quite deli, tastes like chicken. this is the first time I heard someone ate donkey meat. so how does it taste like?


9. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 12:42 pm :: 
milktea: Over here "秋风吹,三蛇肥". Next month, when the weather cools, it will be season to eat snake. Deep fried are the nicest.

Then again, no need to wait so long lah. I everyday also jia juar one.. kekekeke....


10. faythxz left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 2:32 pm
OMG!!!! or should i say Wah Lan Eh haha....i would never have swollowed that! i refuse to even eat the "ha ma la si"


11. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 3:54 pm :: 
faythxz: Wah lan eh is right! I couldn't have put it any better. Perhaps maybe simi lan jiao?
Ok ok... this blog is getting too coarse liao. ~lol.
p.s. er... What is "ha ma la si"?


12. chendeneng left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 4:32 pm
aiyo, 'yi xing bu xing'
any 'reaction' after eating that?
btw, i like the 'salty fried snake meat' (jiao yan she) too. beri, beri good!


13. chendeneng left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 4:41 pm
are you currently in north eastern china (dong-bei)?


14. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 4:43 pm ::
Chen Deneng: Bor leh...morning wake up still like that leh... I think if I wake up see donkey, I die heart attack siah. ~LOL


15. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 4:48 pm ::
Chen Deneng: ShiJiaZhuang to be exact. But come back liao.


16. Chendeneng left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 5:26 pm
ya, then u can go us of a to join lockson liao!
his 'horse' vs yr 'donkey'!


17. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 5:38 pm :: 
Chen Deneng: Hahahaha..... I KNEW that was going to come up sooner or later. ~LOL


18. Chendeneng left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 5:59 pm
i am too predictable for you liao!
must change tact.


19. The Hungry Bunny left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 6:05 pm :: http://thehungrybunny.blogspot.com
ewww. disgusting can?


20. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 6:44 pm :: 
Chen Deneng: It has to come out eventually (no pun intended). Glad you had the honour to let it out.
 
Oook... that did not come out right....

The Hungry Bunny: Over here, considered mild already... got lagi more ewwwww one....


21. Lynne left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 8:49 pm
Seriously? Wow, must try ... yeah rightttt! Next time, they will treat you to a owl steamboat, yeah, an owl, the one that hoots at night.


22. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 9:14 pm :: 
Lynne: Er.... tastes like chicken? I think I can stomach that as long as the bird don't stare back at me.
Bat I eaten before already and so I think owl can handle lah... Just don't do the hoot hoot while in the steamboat can liao.


23. hitomi left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 10:06 pm
eeeeeeeeeeeee..................


24. JayWalk left...
Wednesday, 28 September 2005 11:47 pm ::
hitomi: In all fairness hor, not bad lah... just need to overcome the psychological factor lor.


25. faythxz left...
Thursday, 29 September 2005 10:28 am
it the lai ha ma (toad) sold in packs like ready snacks with the full toad shape and even the toes!!! i can handle frog legs cos u can't see the toes and the body just the leg but this is a full toad YUCKS


26. JayWalk left...
Thursday, 29 September 2005 12:19 pm ::
faythxz: Toad not poisonous meh? I do know that some of the native Indians of America used to lick the skins of a particular species of toad to get high. Some sort of narcotics for them. 

I think I don't have the stomach to eat a toad too.

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